Kevin WK: Jus' Riffin About Saints Row: The Third

If you had told me last year that I would have access to amazing games like Skyrim, Battlefield 3, Modern Warfare 3, and Uncharted 3, yet only play Saints Row: The Third (SR3), I would have laughed and taken you off my friends list.  Well, I would've had to eat those words, because that is now my reality. 

I have never laughed so hard and felt as addicted to a sandbox game as I have with SR3.  I start to watch the city and how it reacts to everything, from random people getting pulled over by the police to Professor Genki, (a man in a cat suit with his own TV show), going on a random killing spree.  I could spend all day posing for pictures with people, performing wrestling moves on old women, and calling in airstrikes to a gang of Mexican wrestlers.

Even though this is a sequel, you don’t need to play the first two to get into the story; they refresh you from the beginning.  The Third Street Saints have gained a reputation as the best in Stillwater.  They have now taken the nation by storm with a great marketing staff and stores that sell their logos and likeness.  They are gangsta celebrities; when not taking over the streets, they are signing autographs or doing product placement in Japanese commercials.  They are both loved and hated the world over as other gangs get jealous and want a piece of the pie.  You can guess where that goes next. 

The first thing you do is bring your custom character to life.  There are actually a ton of different options; gender, hair, and clothes are at your disposal.  You can even change your characters voice.  I started with a Zombie voice that just yelled and mumbled, which was great until I realized I would like to know what he is saying.  Seriously, even the subtitles just say “mumbles” when he talks.  Once you have your character, you can upload them to the community and others can download your creation as well.

In case you somehow forgot what Kevin looks like in his boxers

The gameplay of Saints Row is very similar to GTA in the form of a living, breathing world.  When walking down the street, people will recognize you.  NPCs may even want you to pose for pictures, and what better way than giving a DDT to a helpless old woman.

The missions in SR3 are plentiful and include everything from survival missions to escort missions.  Even insurance fraud scenarios that were in the previous releases made it into this latest installment, and they are still super fun to play.  You can buy property and make money off of the businesses by the hour as well as get discounts for being the big boss.  You go on missions for all kinds of different characters like Ex-FBI agents, pro wrestlers, and a pimp with an autotuned voice (my personal favorite).  His intro to the game is one of the most outrageous moments I have ever had in a video game experience, yet so fitting to this game.  Warning: as the screen shot below indicates, this video is not safe for work or those easily (or even moderately) offended.  Language, sex, guns ..... you get the idea.

If you write this off as another Grand Theft Auto cash-in, I challenge you to give this game a try.  It will be more than worth your time.  If anything, GTA should take a cue from The Third Street Saints.

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In the very remote chance that you have never read our blog before, Kevin WK has been a fixture here at Achievos, both in text and video form.  Below is his latest YouTube contribution. And don't forget that we are in the middle of a contest ! Comment on the blog or on the blog's Facebook page between now and Dec 5th for your chance to win the full game download of Fruit Ninja for FREE !  In the meantime, bask in Kevin's naked, hairy glory.

Grand Theft Auto IV

Another delicious taste of pure anarchy from the Grand Theft Auto lineup. And what can I say? IV delivers. Although, in my opinion (which you obviously want because - hello - you're reading my blog), this game is freaking hard. Not necessarily the concepts. Maybe just the controls?

Story 9/10: Niky, Niky... If you can play this game and not fall for Niko Bellic, I just don't know. You must be made out of steel. I love the story-line and how it progresses with Niko. You are constantly finding out just tidbits abou this life before he came to America. And everything you find out emotionally ties you to him as a character/person. Actually, I cared so much for Niko that it made me angry that I didn't have more options to be a "good guy". I wished GTA & Fable would have a little game baby where I could cause mayhem but maybe also be good. Niko wanted to come to America for a fresh start, and here I am with my Xbox just making him shoot drug dealers all day long. I guess, in a way, he's doing good for society?

Graphics 9/10: The graphics on this one are solid. I mean, there is a LOT going on in this game and I think that it is all handled well and with great detail. I love the chance to change Niko's clothes (although I wish there were even more options). The detail and damage system for the cars/motorcycles/boats/helicopters etcetc is great. Also - non-graphic related - I think the cars last longer in this GTA than they have in previous versions. Longer lasting car = more mayhem = more fun! The cutscenes are fun to watch, and play out kind of like a movie. This whole game is like watching a Scorsese film, actually.

Sound 10/10: I'm sorry, but I have to do it. I have to give GTA the 10. Most of the time in this game you are in a car. And what does GTA offer in the car? Your choice of TONS of radio stations. It is so sweet. I prefer Liberty City Rock, although the talk radio station is good for a laugh. I also enjoy the voice-overs in this game. Although I have to play with closed-caption on because half the people are so heavily accented I can't understand them. Believeable, but CC is a requirement.

Gameplay 7.5/10: Okay this is where I ding you, GTA4. I love you and all, but seriously? Could driving a car be any more difficult? And then trying to shoot and drive?? It's like punishment. And there are a LOT of missions where you have to shoot someone and follow them in your car at the same time. I feel like I need a second player to do one or the other because I just can't seem to do it. I'm failing missions left and right on this thing. The race missions? Forget about it. I don't know HOW you get going fast and take a turn without totally losing it (if you know, please please comment I need to pass some of these races!!). The walking around and shooting is pretty concise though, and with practice I've gotten sort-of-fairly decent. I'm not exceptionally good at this style of game, so I don't expect to excel. I don't expect to struggle like crazy either.

Overall 9/10: This game is awesome. It is fun. The map is unbelieveably gigantic. The options are so vast it's close to limitless. One bummer? All I heard was the hype for this game - it's going to be so huge, they actually used NYC blueprints to create the game, etcetc. Well, I'm bummed that I can't go into more buildings. Unless it's part of the current mission you're playing you are pretty limited. There are maybe 5 or 6 shops/bars/restuarants you can go into on each island, and they are mostly repetitive from island to island. It's just kind of a bummer. If you go to all the work of making the game look like a real place, how about treating it more like a real place? Open up a few more buildings for us to explore.

Buy/Rent: As always, I am far from finishing this game at time of review, but it plays a lot like any other GTA I've played. And that means Buy. There is never a time when it isn't fun to throw this game in and tear some shiz up. You can tear around town in a sports car, or a semi-truck, or any other myriad of vehicles. Your choice! And with guns! Go now and buy buy buy!